page sixteen: grammy recap

aretha franklin is worshipped. selena gomez looks good in straplesses. paramore shoulda beat train. gaga is birthed from a pod. justin bieber needs to embrace his changing voice. usher proves himself to be out of touch, yet again. cee lo is a god and gwyneth is his angel. the avett brothers make me cream my pants. bob dylan is the grim reaper. katy perry copies britney (quelle surprise). norah jones, john mayer as jack sparrow, and keith urban do acoustic dolly parton. drake is a sex god but rihanna is a bore. mick jagger proves he still has it (and probably always will). lady antebellum wins almost everything, except arcade fire, who, after years of being underdog beauties, collect the coveted album of the year. there is hope in this manic world, after all.